My Boobs are like Mary Poppin’s Purse

Cause I am a bit bored, a bit sad, a bit…me

So twenty years ago – and more – I hated my body.

I was 120 with round hips and breasts that just wouldn’t stop.

And shopping was a curse – how do you show off a little waist and the monsters that lived in my chest? You didn’t.

And I was an athlete so how did you strap those babies down? As best you could!

But now, now I am just trying to hike those babies up so they don’t hit my knees…and in the process a revelation of sorts….

So now that I am not trying to show my girls off I have a whole avenue of – fucking awesomeness at my disposal.

I have found with the new bra that I can tuck all sorts of stuff in tight…like a ID, a credit card, money, my phone, my keys…

Built in storage – I kid you not.

And I know so many of my bartenders have watched me pull a boob-card or boob-cash out and I see your face / trust me my boobs come in peace!

But really! My boobs and my bra have become fucking Mary Poppins purse – you never know what will come out but you gotta know it will be spectacular!

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